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We have within us, the seed of who we might be and that can only grow through the nurture of knowledge. At time of terrific threat, we see life with great clarity. In that instant our life passes before us, and all the regrets, hopes and yearnings, that form our personality, present themselves for inspection. Our future is, in that moment, a possibility or an impossibility, depending on the decision that implants itself, right then, as a seed in our mind. The decision we took in that moment, has brought us to this place. The decisions we take now, will set the course of our future direction. Now is the moment of power in our life and knowledge is the fuel.
The various cures for cancer
The more we dig in this field of cancer, the more "cures" we find. I once asked an oncologist why he had not informed us of a particular protocol. "There are too many," he said without looking up from his notes "if you wish to follow this or that fad, then do so, but I will only offer tried and tested regimes, within the medical framework." At the time, I was discouraged by his disparaging use of the word "fad" and it was much later, in searching for our particular "cure", that I slowly came to the understanding that his world and ours, were not too far apart, but it took me a long time to come to such conclusion. Not that I agree with chemotherapy in all cases, nor do I necessarily agree with the medical protocols chosen at the expense of a gentler, natural approach, nor even that an exclusive natural approach should be followed at all cost. Research has shown in some cases that a natural, nutritional approach is no less successful than some chemotherapeutics. Why then would a learned doctor choose a regimen that is guaranteed to make the patient ill, when other natural options are available?
No doubt, we all have our own and individual opinions on the matter and like the many-layered onion, there can be no single answer. After all, we all operate according to our own beliefs, which arise from the cognitive and physical training that is true for us. We are all influenced by significant others in our life, parents, teachers, partners and in the case of doctors, drug companies. If you want to see a person who is likely to dispense drugs and have an answer based on drug protocols, then go to a doctor. If you want to see someone who is likely to advise a natural course of action, following a nutritional approach, go to a naturopath. Simple really.
Anger with Doctors
It is quite common to come across people who have been diagnosed with cancer and who are following a regimen of natural and traditional medicine, to be angry with the Western Medical Model. I have encountered people who spend endless hours deriding doctors and their chemotherapeutic approaches, and quite frankly, I was put off, in those early days, by the venom, and sought my own answers, simply to get away from what I saw as spiritually deficient fellow travelers. It is vitally important to be aware of your company. Who surrounds you? Who influences you? Who do you model, in your effort to achieve what it is that you want to achieve? Personally, I didn't want to be around people who were bitter and angry all the time. I didn't want to be around people who had only a singular view of the world.
The doctors I came across were usually, kind, empathetic and gifted human beings. Sure enough, most of them were time poor. Under the pump, one of my children observed, but each and every one, had their patient in mind. Similarly with those who practiced natural medicine, the majority were good, decent human beings who simply wanted to help. So why do so many people feel that they must align themselves with one or the other? Why the anger? Why the xenophobic view of the healing world, the us or them and nothing in between view of healing? Elizabeth Kubler-Ross identified five stages in death and dying and I believe that they are relevant when dealing with a diagnosis of cancer, after all, like it or not, cancer is seen, in Western society at least, as likely to lead to a premature death.
Denial of diagnosis & prognosis
Our immediate reaction to a diagnosis is "No! This can't be happening to me!" Our natural reaction is to deny and the chasm between what we have heard and our subconscious desire to survive, provides us with a numbness. A cushioned reaction to the physical reality that exposes our mortality and suddenly all of those things that we wanted to do and should have done, flash before us. Images of our family and loved ones etch them selves into our brain and we may be overcome with grief in the knowledge that such an awful event has come to pass.
Partial Acceptance & Anger
At some point, an acceptance comes upon us. Our doctor has provided us with an answer as to why we have felt so ill these past months. Sometimes we are able to know immediately, the cause of our cancer, sometimes not. Often we are able to go back those few years and contemplate on the underlying event that caused the disharmony in our life and so pin point (rightly or wrongly) what we perceive to be an answer as to why this has come about. We get some kind of closure on the reasons and such closure allows us to then, accept where we are. With the acceptance comes anger. "Why me?" All around us we see others who surely live in a poorer lifestyle, taking little care of them selves and less care of others. We have always eaten well (almost always) and yet these other people never cook! They eat from paper bags, anything that can be pre-prepared or cooked by someone else and yet here we are, I'm the one with cancer and they're over there, Scott free. Life isn't fair! It's not right! And yet we are power-less to do anything about it, because we have now seen three doctors and they have all agreed. I have cancer - and now I'm angry about that, because it simply isn't fair!
Acceptance & Recognition.
So here we are, certainly feeling ill and suddenly we find ourselves following a course of chemo-therapy, prescribed by our new acquaintance, the oncologist. There has been some talk of surgery and for others there has already been surgery. Swept into the theatre almost before we knew it. Frightened and fearful at what our new life will bring. What will be the outcome? How will I live now? Is this what my life has come to? Slowly we recognize that we have this illness, no matter how much we denied it in those first few days, it is still here. Like some entity within us and we beseech the surgeon to cut it away and make us whole again. We have cancer and now we are in the hands of the doctors and surgeons and fear lives as a constant companion.
Generation of a Solution
For many, regular trips to the oncology ward, becomes routine. Nurses and staff in drab gowns and face-masks, insert drips and administer solutions that they dare not touch. At these times we feel awful and nausea and vomiting are no longer only the feelings after a big night out. At times we feel like the illness is forcing us to succumb and once or twice, we have faced the reality of death. For those of us who are religious, we turn to God for comfort and attempt to find reassurance in the solace of His company.
Some of us seek other ways to find comfort and reassurance. Some find support groups of like-minded people and it is here, among our new like-minded friends, that other options are offered and discovered. We talk to people who have not experienced chemo-therapy for many years now, who meditate regularly and even those who have returned to work and lead, what many may see as "normal" lives - normal, that is, except for these regular support meetings and daily routines of meditation and mindfulness.
Gradually, almost miraculously, we catch a glimmer of hope and just as slowly, we begin to form a plan. Simple at first, perhaps only a determination to attend a support group, perhaps a decision to investigate meditation and relaxation, maybe, reluctantly, we agree to look at our diet. We read about all the cures that seem to abound in this other world and hopefully, we come to realize that all "cures" are not.
Development of New Behaviors
Now we have a plan. Sometimes the fear of our prognosis haunts us, but with new-found skills, we manage to keep those fears under control. We accept life now, for the gift that it is and suddenly colors are more vibrant, friendships are more valued and simply being alive is a joy. Why wasn't life always like this? We see the angers in others who are stuck in their stage of healing and sometimes never leave that emotional place because it allows them a kind of power. The power to have a view that many will agree with and so the view is reinforced. Surely, living one's life in anger is a sad existence when the option of joy is so easily available.
I am John Allan and until next time, good luck and may your God be with you.
References:
Kubler-Ross,On Death & Dying,Tavistock Pub.Ltd.1970
John Allan is a counsellor epxerienced in EFT, NLP, and meditation, with fifteen years experience in assisting people with serious illness and their carers. He is a published author and speaker and the founder of http://www.cancercauseandeffect.com/ where he has a regular blog. John is based in country South Australia.
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